Gelonade by Rythm

Weigh-In and Grind

This is a review of the cannabis strain Gelonade, as grown by Rythm in Illinois. Stanky post-grind. The contents of the glass jar eighth weighed out to 3.94 grams. Much appreciated. Three large nugs. Good on them. You don’t see as many large nugs these days.

It’s a great grind. This bud is rather fresh. I decided to open it pretty much as soon as I bought it, which isn’t always the case. I like to keep some jars in inventory, just in case. So it’s nice to grind up some bud that was packaged only six or seven weeks ago. For the aroma, at least.

The buds were a little sticky breaking up. I’m using a grinder but I will still break apart a large nug into little popcorn pieces before turning the grinder on them. The aroma is skunk and funky. The bud is cured and not at all wet. The grind is even and dark green in color. What’s good grind look like? You know it when you see it.

Taste & Effects

The Gelonade is a tasty one. It’s a funky orange-rubber taste. Similar to other strains with similar lineage like Lemon Bean or Biskante. And quite similar in taste to Rythm’s L’Orange, although the genetics aren’t as much a match. I say it’s like if a pencil had an orange-flavored eraser, that’s what this smoke tastes like. It’s not a sharp citrus tange. It’s a rounder, softer orange flavor, with that funky rubber element mixed in. And there’s some menthol or numbing effect on the tongue.

I’m high now. It’s a pretty fast-acting high. Maybe that’s what we mean when we are talking about sativa effects. The come on is quick, in your face, up in your mind. The bite. It could be from the Gelato branch of the genetic tree, which draws on both Durban Poison, the South African landrace sativa, and the Burmese landrace sativa. I guess that’s why I was always surprised Gelato would be listed as an indica-leaning hybrid.

Anyway, Gelonade is a cross of Gelato and Lemon Tree. Lemon Tree is a cross of Sour Diesel and Lemon Skunk, both considered sativas in their own right. But, for me, Sour Diesel never has had an energizing effect and Lemon Skunk has been an uplifting but never a racy sativa smoke.

I wonder, though, where the orange rubber flavor comes from. Not Sour Diesel. Not Gelato. Maybe from the Lemon Skunk part of the lineage. Or maybe the flavor is sui generis, arising only when Gelato and Lemon Tree are crossed.

Prepare for the head rush with Gelonade, is the long and short of it. Outside, it’s snowing like hell. I have been shoveling on and off for hours but it keeps falling. I’ll go back out again later. I am stunned and knocked back a bit by all of this snow. I’m sore from shoveling and while the weed never makes me feel worse it does do a heck of a good job of pointing out to me the strains I have lurking in my musculature. And I mind those yellow flags because pushing through a strain is never a good idea. Even stretching through a small strain I discover while high has gotten me in trouble. It feels good at the time to stretch, especially because I’m under the influence. But it always seems to make me feel worse the next day.

The Carry

It’s a bumpy transition between the sativa head rush and the mellower, chill effects of Gelonade that follow the initial zap. This is how I tend to feel after smoking Sour Diesel or Durban Poison. After that initial bite, the high is a prototypical indica stone, at least for me. But the Gelonade is strong. I was chilled out for hours. There was a moment where I was going to smoke again, something else to get me lifted back up.

But then I forgot about that plan and I was asking myself, “Have I smoked again, or not?” I hadn’t. And that would be evidence in favor of the carry or strength or stamina of the Gelonade experience. I was just standing around in my house as the snow kept falling. I was watching the red cardinals and their pretty red-gray mates visit the feeders, peck for remnants on the snow-wrapped ground.

Then I was chatting with my wife. I’m not really a chatter, so getting to that lightness is a good thing. I’m still a little glassy as I write this recap. Two highs in one with the Gelonade? I could make an argument. The bridge between the two is weak, so don’t place too much importance on that transition phase, because it isn’t one sensation or the other so it feels like oblivion. Once you get out of there, you can do pretty much anything you want.